


Pull Me Closer

by chuusvt



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Im bad at this, M/M, ill add while i go, tagging is hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-13
Updated: 2016-09-19
Packaged: 2018-07-23 18:29:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7475238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chuusvt/pseuds/chuusvt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a list of drabbles mostly about SoonHoon and JiHan lmao (because i find committing to a story hard). Enjoy!<br/>Twit: @warmunit<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Love Can Heal (Too Much Can Kill)

"Soonyoung?"  
"Yeah?"  
"I'm aromantic."  
"Then why'd you say no when I offered for us to watch 'Love, Rosie'?"  
"What the fuck."

It took nearly thirty minutes for Soonyoung to actually understand what aromanticism is, but it didn't take longer than a minute after that for him to realize that he just felt his heart crack (physically or emotionally, he couldn't tell) because Jihoon just told him that he isn't capable of loving past the platonic and familial way.

It hurt him even more because he loved Jihoon in everything past the platonic and familial way.

Whether Jihoon knew this or not, he doesn't know.  
He doesn't want to know.  
Because if Jihoon really did know, then how cruel could he be to let his heart break like this?

//

It wasn't until Jihoon was fifteen when he learned that he was aromantic, and that hundreds of people were, too. Now, it wasn't a huge shock for him because he always accepted the fact that he can't hold his friends' hands in anything but a platonic way, but it did shock Soonyoung. (The boy thought being aromantic meant binge watching romantic comedies until they rot and die.)

It hurt to watch his close friend start to crumple in front of him because he knew.  
It hurt him because he loved Soonyoung, just not the same way Soonyoung loved him.

Because Jihoon knew very well, but he was still weak enough to let him fall like this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol is it good idk please comment lmao have a nice day :)


	2. 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jisoo felt the same, even when Jeonghan was right beside him.

"Is it weird to say that nothing's changed since the day I met you?"

"Perhaps it's because you've loved me since the very second you were born."

Jisoo didn't oppose to that statement, not because he was speechless, but because a small part of him knew it was true.

Because even if Jeonghan's only been in Jisoo's life for two months, Jisoo felt like his whole life was spent growing, laughing, and loving someone he never met 'til the eve of his twenty-first birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> super short hopefully it wasnt boring??


	3. Need

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jihoon wished on Soonyoung, the brightest star he's ever came across.

He didn't need expensive gifts and displays of affection. He just wanted to know that Soonyoung will never give up on them, something that could grow beautiful as the years go by.

Jihoon just wanted Soonyoung to stay.

Jihoon wished that Soonyoung had stayed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so bad at this wth anyways have a great day yall :D


	4. Fools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeonghan and Jisoo were together, then not.

Jeonghan was 9 when he met Jisoo. The two were inseparable; two peas in a pod, B1 and B2, a one plus one deal you see on the overhead signs at the nearby store.

Jisoo was 12 when a cheerleader stole his first kiss under the bleachers. He went home paddling his bike and didn't get a blink of sleep that night. It didn't feel right.

Jeonghan was 13 when he realized he loved Jisoo; Jisoo didn't like him back, but that was okay for now. He just hoped that Jisoo's heart will change soon.

Jisoo was 15 when he started dating Seungcheol, the principal's son. He was kind, generous, bright, and everything Jisoo had always wanted. This was the first time Jisoo was genuinely happy.

Jeonghan was 16 when he felt the world crash down right in front of him. His parents were separating, they barely had any money under their name, school was getting harder and harder by each passing minute, and Jisoo didn't know any of this.

Jisoo was 18 when he saw Seungcheol holding someone's (Seungkwan's) hands as if he was the only one he is capable of reaching out to even if Jisoo was always right there. Jisoo knew it was the end.

Jeonghan was 18 when his mom remarried a wealthy businessman who gave them enough money to enter a university at Los Angeles; a business school with not much foreigners, but strangely, it felt right for him to be there.

Jisoo was 21 when Jeonghan came back to Seoul with Junhui by his side. Jisoo didn't know if he was happy because Jeonghan was back, or sad, because Jeonghan was back, and his heart was taken by another before Jisoo got to claim it as his.

Jeonghan was 24 when Junhui knelt before him, a ring in between his fingers. "Will you marry me?" he said with a hopeful glint in his eyes. Jeonghan ran away, not because he didn't want to say yes, but because he didn't see Junhui; he saw cat-like eyes and a gentle smile and Jeonghan felt terrible and why did the world make him like this?

Jisoo was 24 when Jeonghan barged into his apartment, eyes overflowing with tears and hands sweaty and red. Jeonghan screamed about how he was stupid and cruel and idiotic for still loving him. What did Junhui do, Jisoo thought.

Jeonghan was 26 and the last time he saw Junhui was when he was on a date with a boy who had sharp eyes and dark hair. Jeonghan was happy because Junhui was finally able to let go of the toxic love between them.

Jisoo was 27 when Jeonghan told him he loved him with everything he's got, and he was stupid for only realizing this after 18 years of friendship. Jisoo finally got the happiness he deserved.

Jeonghan was 29, so was Jisoo, and they were happily married and lived in a 49 square meter apartment just on the outskirts of Seoul. They were finally Jeonghan&Jisoo, they were finally one again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao just realized my soonhoon chapters are sad and stuff then my jihan chapters involve numbers oh well thank u for reading and leave a comment :D


	5. Always

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jihoon should've held on.

There was never a time Jihoon's mind was void of Soonyoung.

He feels Soonyoung when he's alone.

He hears Soonyoung in the melodies he plays.

He sees Soonyoung in the middle of a crowded hallway.

There was never a time Jihoon's mind was void of Soonyoung and his upturned eyes, his delicate moves, his beautiful smile.

There was never a time Jihoon's mind was void of Soonyoung and how they were so close, so terribly close, to something beautiful , yet incredibly toxic.

There was never a time Jihoon's mind was void of Soonyoung and the could've been's and should've had's that came with the euphoria of finding someone you couldn't live without.

There was never a time Jihoon's mind was void of Soonyoung and how he chose to walk away that stormy, October evening.

There was never a time Jihoon's mind was void of Soonyoung and how his heart breaks a little every single time he knew he should've ran after him.

There was never a time Jihoon's mind was void of Soonyoung, and how he shouldn't have let him leave with a soul that didn't belong to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inspired by jihoon's answer to a fan asking him about when he thinks of soonyoung  
> thanks for reading and leave a comment :D


	6. With Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a bit of spring cleaning.

And so,

I have put away

the photographs,

every trace of you

I know.

 

The things that seem

to matter less,

are the ones

we put on show.

\- _Lang Leav's The Things We Hide (Love and Misadventure)_

 

//

 

It was the beginning of May and Soonyoung needed to clean.  
He swept the tiled floors, he wiped the countertops, and replaced the old bedsheets.

And yet, he still felt unclean, as if there was still something that he forgot to wash or throw.

That's when he saw it.

On the third shelf of his bookcase lies a dusty, purple-gray scrapbook, its edges already blunt and worn out.

He remembered how he got it: on the 21st of March, Jihoon gave it to him as a graduation present. He was so excited to fill it up with all the candid polaroids and unsent letters (that he knew he should've sent because maybe, just maybe, they wouldn't have ended up like this).

He remembered exactly how it all ended: Jihoon choosing to study in Australia, Jihoon choosing to let Soonyoung go because he "can't let him suffer like this," Jihoon choosing to leave him behind even if they both knew that they will always have the other, even without the label.

Soonyoung thinks that maybe it's for the better, maybe Jihoon wasn't meant to be a constant in his life, and that the universe thought they would be better apart.

 

//

 

_Dearest Jihoon,_

_Did you know that the sun is approximately one hundred forty-nine point six million kilometers from the earth? I didn't think it was that far, I mean, you are the only light I see._

_Anyway, I wanted you to know that no matter what you end up choosing, I'm wholeheartedly staying with you every step of the way._

_Whatever path you choose, you will always have me in tow._

_Whichever way you go, I will follow, even if it lead to hell, because hell wouldn't be as bad as long as I have you._

_With love,_  
_Soonyoung._

 

//

 

Soonyoung slides the scrapbook under his bed, shrugs the heartache off his shoulders, brings out all the gold medals he's won from his dance and Taekwondo competitions, and hangs them everywhere; on his bookshelf, lamp, side table, even around his husky's neck.

He decides that maybe someone better than Jihoon would find him after seeing all these giant coins popping out in his apartment like a sore thumb.

He decides that maybe he'd find a greater, better love who isn't Jihoon.

But his heart decides that maybe there isn't any one else other than Jihoon, who always stayed with him before that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its been so long aaaaaaaa im sorry  
> also if this kinda sucked but hey at least i was able to get something out


End file.
